The semester I spent at Michigan State was a constant battle to get my medication prescription refilled. At that time, I was taking 20 mg a day of Prozac, which really helps me not to self harm, and lifts some of the worst of my depression. I was prescribed this by a psychiatrist in England... and, when my prescription ran out, I needed to see a pyschiatrist here in Michigan to get a new one.
So after having had to make a couple of trips to emergency mental health services in Ingham County, when my prescription ran out and the Olin Health Center's ONLY Psychiatrist had a six month waiting list... I finally was referred to the MSU Psychiatry Clinic at Fee Hall. I saw an intern, Dr Hamm, who had seen me once before back in February when I showed up at the Mental Health Crisis Centre. She claimed not to remember anything from that time, except my accent. Now, I'm not sure that I believe her.
This appointment with her lasted for an hour, during which time I gave her an outline of my psych history, the periods of depression and the times I'd been in therapy and how I was now really working with my therpist at Olin, and doing much better... I made it clear that I really only wanted a repeat prescription, to help with the cutting. She told me she would have to present my case, and that I should come back next week. I paid my $45 co-pay, and left, feeling slightly disappointed and anxious.
So I returned for a half hour appointment a week later, where she DID give me a script for 30 days worth of Prozac with one refill... and then said that I was not appropriate for this clinic, as I did not have a simple "mood disorder" such as depression.. because I self harmed, and had a history of eating disorders. So she would get a referral for me, either to the Olin Psychiatrist, or to someone in the community.
One week later, and I go back to see Kevin, my therapist.. and he informs me that Dr Hamm has diagnosed me as having Borderline Personality Disorder. He disagrees totally, as does his supervisor, as do the two therapists who have been running the survivors group I attended last semester. He also let Dr Hamm KNOW that he disagreed during their phone conversation.
Talking to people on Sanctuary, it turns out that I am not the only mildly dissociative, self harming abuse survivor to have been wrongly diagnosed with BPD. So I did some research on BPD, and found the following links to be useful in my information gathering:
So.. after reading all that, I managed to convince myself that I really DON'T have this disorder. The problem is, it is now on my medical records at the pysch clinic. I am trying to get this removed, but am caught in a bind... if I say to Dr Hamm that I disagree with her, then I am acting in a "borderline" way, and thus, in her eyes, confirming her diagnosis. More updates will follow.. but I am really interested in hearing from anyone else who has been through a similar experience.
My own view at the moment is that BPD should really stand for Baffled Psychiatrist Disorder .. it seems that when faced with someone who self harms, most pyschs and doctors immediatly jump to a conclusion that this person must therefore be Borderline. The fact that 75% of those diagnosed are women, and that 75% of those diagnosed have been sexually abused as children make me think that this is really promarily a category for people who don't fit anywhere else. There is no space in the DSM for people who cut apart from BPD.. which makes me feel like a lot of "sloppy diagnosing" is going on.
I mean, at a maximum, I fit
two and a half of the DSM criteria for BPD. And they require at
least 5 to make a diagnosis. But that didn't seem to matter to
the doctor who saw me. She had a box in which to put me.. never
mind that it didn't fit.
OK.. end of rant for now.
Please please email me and let me
know if you've had anything similar. Astraea also have a great
page of links on Psychiatric Abuse and
misdiagnoses. You might find help there. I will keep this page
updated with what goes on. Right now, I'm collecting letters from
my therapists who disagree with the diagnosis, just in case I
have to fight it for immigration reasons.
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